I fucked up at work today. Pretty badly. Not "You're fired" badly, but bad enough. It was just something stupid, really. Not seeing the big picture. But man, seeing that look in my boss' eyes. It's like disappointing my father; I just want to crawl into a hole and disappear.
I managed not to actually cry at work though - 'cause that's always fun. As soon as I was out and able to call the Mr. though - the tears started flowing. Yet another moment when I wish to god I wasn't so emotional. And here I gnash my teeth when the WB starts up. Hellllooooo, genes. Are there emotional genes? Let's just say yes and call it a day.
I have to say though - I feel very, very sorry for people who don't have some sort of support system when they get home. Because nothing in the world will make you forget about your dismal work situation then your 4yr old daughter telling you when you pick her up from pre-school that, "You're the best, Mama." Or having your husband come home with open arms for a big, long hug (and a bottle of wine too!)
And yes, even though I remain a little weepy, I'll get through it. I'll toe the line at work (must google where that phrase came from. And shouldn't spell-check recognize "google" by now? Ah-ha. Apparently it does recognize it if you capitalize the "G" - and just for that, I'm not.) I do really need to get my focus together with the work factor. Maybe this is the wake up call I need. That and the realization that I should really, probably, finally, after all these years find myself a good therapist and get my shit together!!! (Part of that whole 39 year thing.)
Anyhoots - sorry, this post is kind of all over the map. Much like my brain of late. Har-dee-har-har. Enough about me, how was your day?
